Why Not?

I’ve never really planned out my life. I’ve never really been one of those people who was going to do x by this age, and be y by this age.

I’ve always tried to do what will make me the happiest at that moment and point in my life. Whether that’s taking a job in my hometown, spending a month working remotely in Costa Rica, traveling across India volunteering on my own, or moving back to Thailand.

Selfish and irresponsible, maybe. Rewarding and character-building, most definitely.

My entire adult life I’ve gravitated to living for the present future, rather than the actual future. And with that I’ve had very little regard for the far future – which we all know involves retirement savings, health insurance, investments, and all those little adult things one is supposed to do.

I guess you could say I’m living life “the easy way”…

“Do the difficult things while they are easy and do the great things while they are small. A journey of a thousand miles must begin with a single step.”—Lao Tzu

With this lifestyle comes both anxiety and great opportunities. Luckily I’ve learned to somewhat control my anxiety, by being a day-to-day insane planner, and by doing so I’ve been able to open my eyes to the multitude of opportunities around me.

A year ago, when I first moved back to Thailand, it was my sneaking desire to somehow become a travel blogger. By working and interacting and networking with them, I thought “hey I’ll learn from you and be able to do that too (and maybe even better)”…now, after 12 months of meeting more than 40 travel bloggers I luckily know that is not my calling. Yes, I love traveling. Yes, I love writing. And more than that I love the thought of being paid to do both. However, I hate the thought of promoting and taking pictures of myself. But most of all, I hate the thought of experiencing a new culture, new country, or new experience with the pressure of having to write about it. You lose that sense of curiosity and become too focused on getting that perfect photo.

With this newfound realization in hand, that’s how we get to the one night in a non-touristy town on the border of Malaysia, a craft beer in hand and me hearing the words come out of my mouth, “Why not?”

“Why not open a hostel together?” “Why not work for ourselves?” “Why not build a life on an island I love?”

Why not…?!

So that’s where my current life journey stands. We are opening a small hostel with Thai partners on the island. Did I think it through fully, probably not as much as most people would. Did I jump at the chance to have something to call my own and be passionate about, most definitely. Am I ridden with apprehension and anxiety, of course. But, have I ever been more excited about anything in my entire life, not at all.

So, why not?!

Construction of our small hostel started last week, I’ll be sure to keep everyone up-to-date on the progress. The plan is to be open in January 2017. We were given the task of naming the hostel and after much deliberation we came up with “Journey”.

Life is a journey. So why not enjoy it, and share it.

Journey on!

TITS

This. Is. Thailand. Shit.

And that “shit” can go either way, like most cuss words, “Shit – yeah!” or “Shit…SHIT”.

Living in Thailand makes you realize just how many rules you are used to living with and following. Here, for the most part, nobody cares what you do or how you do it.

It’s freeing. And weird. And somehow seems to work.

Too often I catch my inner self whispering, “but what if we get stopped/caught…” or “why isn’t anyone saying something to us about what we’re doing…” And then you remember…TITS.

You want to drive on the wrong side of the road? Fine. Just do it with caution. You want to build a beach bonfire, or any fire? No permit needed. You want to pee in public? Why not? Everyone does it. You want to set up a shop on the side of the road? You go girl! You want to drink outside a convenient mart (aka loiter) until all hours of the night? Well duh, the beers are much cheaper and most of the bars are closed by now anyway. TITS!

Thailand is very good about just letting people live. Do what you want. Just don’t hurt anyone else.

I mean take a public bus and just see how many random objects and stops are allowed. One of our last rides had a huge air conditioning unit smashed in with us and an actual bus stop, unheard of. Or as the Thai’s would say “Unseen in Thailand”. You want off, just speak up and the driver will immediately pull over on the side of the highway and wait for you to awkwardly maneuver your way out of the crammed mini-van.

At work and hungry, but don’t want to just “eat at your desk”? Why not lay out a mat on the floor of the airport terminal in front of your shop and invite all the other shop owners to join you for lunch down there. Not “unseen” in Thailand.

Or, just don’t feel like opening your shop, restaurant, or guesthouse today? Or for 4 months. No worries. And why bother putting up a sign explaining how long you’ll be closed.  

What? The 3:30 “scheduled” bus isn’t running today? “Why?” “Don’t know.” TITS. There’s no rhyme or reason as to why they cancel. But they do. And they won’t bother telling you until you ask. Even if you’re holding a ticket. TITS.

Addresses are also basically “unseen” in this country. I’ve asked our favorite bar owner to give me his address so I can create a TripAdvisor listing, it’s now been 3 months and several reminders and he still doesn’t know what it could be. How the postal system operates, I’ll never know. Surely letters aren’t addressed as: “Go down the main road and it’s just past the third 7-11 on your left…”

There are a few actual rules but of course they are meant to be bent and definitely broken (or just not enforced). Last week there was an election (which weirdly no Thai could explain what it was about…which was apparently done on purpose); however, the night prior to the election the sale of any alcohol was prohibited. This rule goes back to when it was commonplace for politicians to buy the vote with free alcohol and a lot of inebriated voters.

Of course we were easily able to find beer: “You selling beer tonight?” “Of course, why not?” “The election…” “Ah, no problem!”

And often what’s even funnier is seeing that they continue to create new rules that will be broken and unenforced.  That same week it came out in the papers that playing Pokemon Go near any polling station was a fineable offense. As if anyone would ever call you out on this. TITS.

Around here you definitely get that feeling of cowboy country meets self-controlled chaos. Because basically that’s what it comes down to. All of your decisions are made not based on the fear of punishment, but on actually using some brain cells and deciding for yourself if what you’re about to do makes sense at that moment in time. Now, more often than not, most Thais will still do whatever they were intending to do, no matter if it makes sense or not. TITS.

A part of me congratulates the Thai people for just living and letting their people live. Because I do like a cold, cheap, beer while loitering.

The other part of me is untrusting of every individual on the road, but learning to again be patient, more laidback, and accepting that this is another culture. But not another world…TITS.

Life is Simple. Just add Water.

And lots of it. Living on a Thai island isn’t always sunshine and rainbows. In fact it’s a lot of intense sun for nine months and then it’s not. Then, it just rains. And here, the saying “when it rains, it pours” could not ring any truer. I have never seen rain like this. Forrest Gump was spot-on when he talked about the rain in Vietnam.

One day it started raining, and it didn’t quit for four months. We been through every kind of rain there is. Little bitty stingin’ rain…and big ol’ fat rain. Rain that flew in sideways. And sometimes rain even seemed to come straight up from underneath. Shoot, it even rained at night…

I can definitely say, we’ve seen all of these types of rain and more. Along with this rain (and the intense heat of months prior) comes blackouts. Electricity failure is common due to all the illegal connections to the grid, so when it’s too something it just shuts down.

So we’ve learned to live with rolling blackouts and all that comes with having no electricity (no air conditioning, fans, wifi, lights, TVs, computers, etc.). We’ve also learned to live with (and sometimes love) many other things that at first seemed like you just can’t live without them, or with them. But, when you have no other options (literally) you can. And you will. And most likely you’ll have a much better experience (or a good story to tell) in their absence or presence.

Take for example the other day I did one of those “just so Asian” things that I’ve always chastised as being so dangerous while also questioning the person’s brain capacity. And I lived. And only got half as soaked had I not rode my bike one handed with my umbrella up the entire time. I had no other options. And in fact I may have even enjoyed it bit…it felt very Mary Poppins like—so no more judging!  But now I do get it. When it rains and you have to be somewhere…you gotta do what you gotta do. At least I didn’t do the total donkey move and put a clear plastic bag all the way over my head to protect me from the rain (now you know who those suffocation disclaimers on the bags are for).

Living on this semi-remote island also leaves you with limited options. Beer, sure there are 3 choices and they all taste the same (like Bud Light).  Food, sure there are two choices Thai food (rice or noodles) or shitty Western food. Wine, yup there’s wine but it will cost you an arm and a leg for a crap bottle of wine that is just $4 in the States. Things to do, absolutely!  If you like the beach…or eating (see above choices)…or drinking (again, above are the choices)…or dodging rain drops, giant muddy puddles, and being splashed by cars while going anywhere…or baking in a sun so hot that you’re always wet with sweat or are on a mission to find the closest AC or body of water…then yes, Lanta is the place for you!

I kid. For the most part.

In truth, this island has some of the most gorgeous beaches, views, and nature you can find in all the world, and it’s all right here on this tiny piece of land in the middle of the Andaman Sea.  And I’m grateful everyday of my life that I’m part of it.

However, we are still living on an island. An island in the tropics. Which, surprisingly, has quite a bit of that isolation feeling still going for it.

We had avocados available for 2 glorious months. We have no clue what the latest movies may be as we most definitely do not have a mall, a theater, or really any resemblance of an enclosed (non-bamboo) shop beyond the bajillion 7-11s. We tell time by the sun (Literally. It rises at 6 am and sets at 6:30 pm. Everyday). Our internet connection is limited to when we’re at home or eating out. Credit cards are not accepted as a form of payment, only cash. And there is an entire menagerie of animals around every corner. In the past week alone we’ve seen: monkeys, giant monitor lizards (think komodo dragon), birds of prey out hunting, a beached dolphin, a dead capybara (Ulick saw that one alone), crabs, house geckos, fish of all kinds, baby squids or jellyfish (unclear), snakes, frogs, rats, turtles, weird living barnacle urchin things, and of course the street packs of feral dogs and cats.

While we may be isolated, we are definitely not alone. There’s a small town vibe going on here—I wave at the same people (and dogs & cows) everyday on the way to and from work—the water man, the ice man, the man in the wheelchair, the old lady with the eye patch, the pharmacy woman who is always buying fried chicken at 8:15 am, the man delivering the fish, the guy we bought our motorbike from, etc.—and having this very “same same” routine day in and day out is weirdly comforting and refreshing.

We know our neighbors. We have a local bar. We spend quality time together. And we have time to dream. What more could you ask for with life.

I’ll definitely take this laid back life of being disconnected and monotonous in our food, drink, and routine 95% of the time—the other 5%, GET ME OFF THIS ISLAND!

Don’t worry, we won’t be naming volleyballs anytime soon. We’ve definitely made plans to get out of here at least once per month; our upcoming trips include: Vietnam, Trang, Bangkok, Japan, Iceland, Hong Kong, Chiang Mai, and then back to the States in December.

#IslandLife

Love in Another World

So, my boyfriend moved across the world for me…what has yours done for you lately? Just kidding, j/k, j/k! 

But in all seriousness, he did. And I couldn’t be more grateful, appreciative, thankful, and most of all happy.

I knew I had it good, but I didn’t realize just how good until we met a newly engaged Austrian couple on the remote island of Koh Ngai. Just days after Ulick’s arrival we sat at a beach bar listening as they told us their romantic, yet unfortunate, story about how Christian had planned to propose to McKayla in the Emerald Cave, however in transit the engagement ring was stolen from his suitcase. Ulick and I oohed and awed in all the right places as he went through his elaborate plan which involved them rowing to this cave in the middle of the sea, and of course felt heartbroken when he told us he did still propose, all as planned, but sans ring. It truly was a moving and refreshing love story, as McKayla couldn’t have been happier or smiling bigger. And it had nothing to do with the size, or sparkle, of her ring.

Conversation then turned to us, and Ulick explained how he had just picked up and moved here a few days prior. It was Christian’s immediate response that I’ll never forget, “Now there’s a true love story.”

I sometimes forget that not all people have my somewhat skewed sense of what adventure means. I forget not everyone has a physical need to travel. I forget that I’m okay being dirty and uncomfortable if it means I’m experiencing something new. I forget that I require less things or modern comforts than the average person, which clearly this just means I’m simple-minded, as nearly anything and everything and nothing can keep me entertained for hours.  But mostly, I forget that not all people can immediately adapt to being a traveler, a gypsy, or an expat.

So for that, Ulick, I apologize. I imagine it can’t be easy and I sincerely thank you for knowingly moving to a world where you’re living with:

• mosquitos, ants, geckos (literally living in the room with you),
• being less connected,
• a whole lot more fishing shows and bad movies,
• my constant poop talk, and;
• one strong, relentless sun.

While you're also living without:

• NFL and NBA games (or really any sports besides soccer),
• American TV,
• Mexican food, sub sandwiches, edible pizza (basically anything but Thai) 
• a car,
• new movie releases (or a movie theater, for that matter),
• craft beer (or again, really anything other than really light beer); but,
• most importantly, your lifelong friends and family.

So I thank Christian for jolting me awake by forever etching in my brain what a wonderful boyfriend I have, and what a giant life change he has made for not only me, but for us.

As the saying goes, sometimes you just have to take the leap and build your wings on the way down. And Ulick, I know that’s exactly what you did.  You leapt. And just decided the rest would sort itself out and your wings would grow.

And grow they have!  You’re now maneuvering a motorbike through Thai traffic (not a small feat), taking Thai language courses (not an easy language), and we are spending Google-free hours solving cold cases, playing brainteasers, enjoying sunsets, coveting dogs, just walking, making friends, trying new foods, discussing earth’s creatures in more detail than a 4th grade science class, dreaming, exploring new places, and most of all just sharing each and every one of these experiences together.

So Ulick, thank you.  Thank you for taking the leap.  Thank you for encouraging me to follow my dream. Thank you for making all the great things in life, grander.  Thank you for allowing me to see Thailand like it’s my first time, through your eyes. But most of all, thank you for walking beside me. My favorite place in the world, is next to you. 

And as I’ve told you before (and clearly stole from someone way more eloquent), I never wanted to be your whole world—just your favorite part. 

You truly are the Sriracha to my life.